On Being Allison

Of course there are a few pics to satisfy those of you who need to see our girl...mom, dad...I must say that I thought the days of tank tops would be over for us by this time of year...but alas it has been another toasty week here in Atlanta.
I wanted to share some thoughts I have come to reckon with this past week. In earlier posts I mentioned struggling to know where Allison was anymore. I am wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, friend...no longer an employee, self-employed you might say...but there is a role in there that is just woman or Allison. I have struggled in knowing where to find her again...Jason has mentioned me auditioning for a show around town and doing that and maybe that's where she would be. But alas, that would take me away from my family for so many nights that I couldn't do that quite yet...in this season at least. Then Jason mentioned, maybe it would be the contract work that I would do around town...KidStuf, JumpStarts, conferences, video shoots...but still that isn't where ALLISON lies. That is just another role of actor...or something like that. Then the other morning I actually got myself up out of bed before Caroline got up, made it downstairs and decided to spend some much needed time with our Lord. While journaling last Saturday morning I felt like the Lord was saying "This is where Allison is. Coming to me. You don't have to be wife or mom when you come to me....just come as Allison." Because see, when I met Him there that morning a sense of full-fillment came over me...I found Allison again in the quietness of my time. I have justified not spending time w/ Him b/c I didn't think I could do it 7 days a week like I used to when I was single. So, here I am saying it for all of you to read...I will spend at least 3 times a week with Him...finding Allison, journaling, being quiet enough to hear how he might mold "her" to then shape and mold those around me. Once Allison is filled, then the other roles I will become for the rest of the day will be affected by how I take care of me...just me...Allison.

She's Huge!

Okay, so maybe not huge as I have read some of our other friend's blog sites and their kids are bigger than CDH and they are2 months younger...hilarious. Drum roll please...Caroline weighed in at her 6 mo. doc apt @ 15lbs (30%) : 26 1/4 in (70%)....long and lean the doc said. He said she is doing great and we are to expect our world to change in the coming months w/ her mobility. Holy cow get ready dogs...Zeke and Zoe have no idea what is about to hit.
Enjoy the pics. Gotta love the one of her on her Daddy's shoulders! The others are what we do most evenings now that it is too chilly to go to the pool. We sit on a blanket in the back yard and love it! Enjoy!

Reflections

Dearest Caroline- As I type this you are sound asleep in your crib and the day is drawing to a close on now your 6 months here in our life. I can hardly believe that September 17 is already here. I looked at the calendar back in March and imagined what it would be like to know you for 6 months...and it doesn't to compare to reality. My darling daughter already I see a joyful spirit in you. I see a bit of a twinkle and onryness that I appreciate, as a fellow onry woman.
I see you learning things daily, like trying to sit up. Who knew the monumental hurdle this would be someday. I thought about that tonight as we sat on the blanket outside w/ daddy, and I was just sitting there, not a challenge at all, yet sometimes as you work on sitting up you fall over, you even spit up...yet you too will master this task, and somehow it will shape the way you develop.
I love how you seem totally fine, and we probably wouldn't know you were hungry until I lay you on my lap on the boppy, and all of a sudden the hunger reality hits you, and you begin to open your mouth and make wonderful moans for food.
I love how I can just say "mama" and your face lights up. I love how when daddy walks in the room and you hear his voice you take great delight. I love how you love to stomp on daddy's dresser and look in the mirror. I love how we can hear you in the early morning hours, not anxious about waking up, but rather waking up with a joy for the day and I know this because of how your talk to yourself experimenting with different sounds and volume levels.
I love bath time...you love bath time...
I love that you are in our family. I love that even now I believe you love daddy and me too.
I forever changed being your mom. I am forever thankful to the Lord for entrusting you to our care. I love you my first born. I love you daughter. I love you bunkin, squeedle, ...my little bug...I love you!

My Buddy...My Buddy...

You all remember the song from when we were growing up..."Wherever I go, she goes..." Jason and I had an awesome opportunity to go to Nashville over the Labor Day Holiday to see some dear friends. I grew up w/ Chris and now since being married our spouses enjoy one another also. Well, we both had little girls this year. They had Finley Hasiah (protected by God) DeTray July 10th...this was our first chance to have them meet Caroline and us meet Finley. Chris' mom...who my niece Emma Kate named Grammy Pammy was visiting her first Grandchild...so we had the whole fam together. That's how it felt too...family. One afternoon Pam offered to watch the girls (courageous if you ask me) and the 4 of us went to a movie...my first theater experience since CDH was born!! We are thankful for friends who are so easy to be with. I will say things are different now that we have kiddos...7am still comes every morning, naps still need to be taken...it is hard this new season sometimes. I know the Lord is shaping us and teaching me in particular about flexibility...not my long suit! I am learning.

Enjoy the pics.

Georgia Game

So the darling beauty didn't actually get to attend her first Georgia game...it'll be awhile before that happens b/c no matter how small all have to have a ticket! This was us just before Jason and I left for Athens. Caroline was still sporting her gear and cheering on the Dogs at her Mimi's house.